The "Killer Klowns"
All of the Killer Klowns
- Jumbo, one of the main Klowns, who liked to annoy Curtis Mooney before killing him and making him his ventriloquist puppet.
- Fatso, a fat Klown who looks like Chubby. Killed a woman who he gave a Valentine's Day card to.
- Shorty, one of the main Klowns. He is the shortest Klown who in 1 scene punched off a gangster's head for breaking his bike with boxing gloves.
- Rudy, one of the main Klowns. He was the first to detect Mike and Debbie's presence at the Klowns' tent and went on a store raid to collect items, terrifying Mr. Marty the store owner.
- Spikey, one of the most commonly-seen Klowns. He in 1 scene did a puppet show for someone before killing him. Spikey also can make a balloon hound that acts like a prison hound.
- Slim, one of the main Klowns. He uses the Tyrannosaur shadow puppet to kill hundreds of people, pretends to drive a motorcycle to push a driver in a car off a cliff, jumps up an extremely tall height, and kidnapped Debbie inside a yellow balloon.
- Bibbo, one of the most commonly-seen Klowns. He has a yellow Mohawk and yellow-red suit.
- Chubby, one of the main Klowns. He demonstrated that the Klowns' purpose in killing humans is to drink their blood using crazy straws.
- Joe, a surveillance guard of the Parade Klowns.
- Magori, only has a small cameo whacking Mike and Debbie while his face is printed on the posters.
- Talls, a surveillance guard of the Parade Klowns.
- Storefront, a surveillance guard of the Parade Klowns.
- Frank, one of the klowns who appeared with the klown army to whack down Mike ,Debbie, and Officer Hansen. He has yellow afro hair with a bald spot and wears a blue suit with pink stripes.
- Boco, one of the klowns who appeared in the middle with Joe and Chubby's second brother to whack down Mike, Debbie, & Officef Dave Hansen. He has yellow afro hair and wears a violet suit with pink stripes
- Female Killer Klowns (Rosebud and Daisy), who (off-screen) sexually harassed the Terenzi Brothers while Mike and Dave were looking for Debbie.
- Baby Killer Klowns, long-necked newborns who grow from popcorn. They were planted around by Jumbo.
- Klownzilla (Originally known as "Jojo"), the biggest Klown whose size makes the other Klowns clear a path for him to go after Mike, Debbie and Dave.
The Humans
- Mike Tobacco, the main protagonist of the film. He is a young adult who is the only one aware of the Klowns genocide determined to warn everyone about the massacres.
- Debbie Stone, Mike's girlfriend and the damsel-in-distress.
- Rich Terenzi, a young adult who always fights with his brother and wants a girlfriend. He tends to be more serious and non-optimistic than his brother.
- Paul Terenzi, Rich's brother who wants a girlfriend. He is very optimstic yet clueless.
- Dave Hanson, a police officer who is the only human capable of fighting the Klowns.
- Curtis Mooney, a violent police sergeant who hates everybody.
- Farmer Gene Green, a farmer who thought the Klowns' tent was Hailey's Comet.
- Mr. Myers, a terrified store owner whose items for sale were stolen/damaged/tested by Shorty and Rudy.